Boys Night Out
by Direwolf

Dusk spread over Patriot City, stealing the last splashes of color and turning the city into a mosaic of gray and black. Only the cones of illumination from streetlights brought a touch of brightness and those were lonely islands in the sea of shadows. Twilight deepened as mothers called to children, telling them it was too dark to remain outside. Pedestrians hurried home eager for safety before darkness fell. With the fading light, the very air grew more chill as if remembering the last winter or foretelling the next. Here at the cusp between night and day, that time of transition, the predators came out of their lairs to hunt.

And as anyone who lived in Patriot City could tell you the most dangerous predators walked on two legs...

"And I tell you it doesn't really matter!" Devon insisted. The twenty-three year old graduate student in Mechanical Engineering rubbed his forehead under his nearly baby-fine black hair. His other hand held the handle to grocery cart filled with the supplies that would keep The Brain Trust functional for another week or so.

Skip, the object of Devon's frustration, looked up though his glasses from where he was crouching. There were two boxes of laundry soap on the floor. "This is why I manage the bills you know."

"But Skip, they are the same! And we already have so much stuff we're going to have to borrow the cart to get it all home. Without Jason to play pack mule, it's just us, and no super strength to help out."

"They are not the same, you'd think an engineer would know that. The box of SeaFoam detergent is less money, but I think the Dirt-a-way uses less per load. Can you please check for me."

"Fine!" Devon took a sliderule from his book bag and quickly ran the numbers. "You're right, the Dirt-a-way will give us four and a half loads more for the money."

"AH HAH!!!"

"Skip, at the rate we go though detergent, three quarters of the box will still be there when we graduate."

"That isn't the point. We only have so much money and we have to make it go as far as we can. Save money here, buy more beer!"

Still arguing, they pushed the cart through the supermarket isles towards the produce section.

The SuperKing was right on the way to the brownstone they rented from City University, making it the logical place to go for supplies. About once a week, the three roommates pooled their money and made a shopping run. Normally, it happened on Thursdays when Skip insisted more things were on sale. Tonight, it was just Skip and Devon doing the shopping. Jason was still at school. Since donning the name and costume of Direwolf, Jason hadn't been putting much time in on his schoolwork over the weekends. And as a graduate student in Geology, he couldn't ignore it for long. It caught him this week and Jason was putting in extra evenings cutting rock into thin sections to catch up.

The produce section was last and under Skip's watchful eye, they loaded up on apples, oranges, cabbage (on sale today), potatoes (also on sale) and assorted other bits and pieces, then they came to the bananas.

"You know, Jason goes through a lot of bananas," Skip mused.

"I noticed that too, he must love them."

"I suspect it's the potassium. The way his body heals, he needs plenty of raw materials to build new cells. We know he can somewhat metabolize his own body parts for basic things like proteins So his body craves trace elements and things like that. Potassium is used in nerves cells, so he needs it whenever he has to regrow tissue. I'll bet we could come up with some sort of pill full of minerals that he could use to speed up his healing."

"That's a good idea, Skip. But what about bananas?"

"Well these ones are on sale. Only five cents for two pounds."

"They look kind of over ripe don't you think?"

"Just because you like them green doesn't mean everyone does. Freckled is ok. Besides, if he's eating them for the potassium, he won't care. And maybe I can make some banana bread from them or something."

"You baking? The last time you tried that, you ended up with muffins that could have served as hockey pucks except they were too hard and would have been a danger!"

"If they were so bad, you come you ate six?"

"Charity."

The squabbling continued as Skip filled a paper bag with freckled bananas and they pushed the cart to the check out line.

Meanwhile, three ominous figures huddled together in the shadows outside the door. The three thieves had been apprehended trying to knock over a Convenience store a few nights ago. But they had slipped away in the confusion of the Liberty Lane station. Well, not exactly confusion. The arresting officers had been regaling their fellow cops with the tale of some costumed schmuck with an exclamation point on his chest and all of the cops had been laughing so hard, no one realized the three crooks had walked out the front door to freedom. Though it had taken them some time, several hacksaws, a blowtorch, a sledgehammer, room full of files and much slapping of faces to figure out how to remove the cuffs.

That debacle behind them, they were now ready to resume their crime spree.

"I still don't see why we need to wear these clothes," the frizzy haired Lawrence complained.

"Shad Up," the irascible Morris said, smacking Lawrence on the face. "Like I told you, they'll be so busy looking at what we are wearing, no one will remember our faces."

Golf cloths. They all wore golf cloths. Complete outfits including kickers, button down shirts with sweater vests, knee socks and golf shoes, as well as tam-o-shatters.

"I think I look quite dashing!" Carl insisted from under a hat the size, shape and general color of a medium sized pizza. "Nayuck, nayuck, nayuck..."

"You are both crazy!" the rubber-faced Lawrence insisted.

"Shad up, both of you!" Morris's slap caught both of their faces. "Now let's go!"

"Wait a minute, Morris, shouldn't we draw our roscoes?" Carl asked.

"Our what?"

"You know, shooting irons, heat, harquebus, derringers, slug throwers!"

"What?"

"GUNS!" Lawrence and Carl shouted together.

"Oh yeah, our guns, almost forgot!"

With that, each of the robbers pulled a snub nosed .38 from the back pocket of their plaid knickers. They walked in the front door of the SuperKing.

"Nobody move, this is a stickup!" Morris shouted. "Every one, hands up were we can see ‘em!"

"Uh, Morris," Carl hissed. "How can the put their hands up if they can't move?"

"Shad up!" Morris's gun made an oddly hollow bonking sound when it hit Carl on the head. For good measure, Morris hit Lawrence as well.

"Ow!" they both said in unison.

"Spread out!" the dark haired Morris snapped, gesturing with his gun. "Ok, sister, open up the cash drawer."

The crooks moved to the first register while all the super market customers held up their hands, all except one.

"Hiissst," Devon whispered to Skip.

Skip glanced over and down. Devon's hands were below the line of their cart, out of sight of the three crooks. Devon had a metal cylinder about the size of a "D" battery in each hand. Skip understood at once. The objects were the flash grenades that Devon made for Jason to use as Direwolf. He was indicating that they should use them to stop the robbery.

Skip considered the unspoken question. He knew the safe thing for everyone was to just let the outlandishly dressed crooks take the money and leave. He'd seen what bullets did to living flesh and no one here was nearly as tough as Direwolf. But Jason always said there was more to being a hero than super powers and a snazzy costume. It was all about helping people and standing up for what you knew was right. But was it worth the risk now?

He looked back at the robbers. They had cleaned out two of the registers and were working on a third. The bald guy in the huge hat had managed to get himself in a bit of trouble. The couple in the check out line had a selected a pair of live lobsters from the seafood counter. One of them had gotten loose and was hanging on the robber's nose.

"Come on!" the sour faced leader said. He and the frizzy haired felon moved on to the next register while the third crook tried to pry the shellfish from his face.

Soon, he wouldn't have to decide. The approaching crooks would be close enough that they would make Devon raise his hands, and then it would be too late.

"But isn't that deciding?" Jason seemed to whisper in his mind. He remembered helping cut the bullet from Jason's leg the first time he'd gone out as Direwolf. But Jason didn't give up. He donned his mask the next night and went out to fight crime again. That was the mark of a hero.

Skip nodded and tried to swallow his heart. He slowly held out five fingers and began closing them one at a time.

The timing was perfect. Skip's thumb closed just as Morris and Lawrence reached the cashier next to them.

"Let's have the greenbacks!" Morris demanded.

Devon pressed the two arming studs and twisted with his thumbs.

"Uh, guys" he said, raising his arms, "Catch."

Skip watched the two grenades arc through the air at the robbers who were looking at them, puzzled. Then Skip shut his eyes. Moment's latter, brilliant light flared. It was so bright, Skip saw the red glow even through his eyelids. He heard the crackle of the gold sparks Devon had added to maximize the confusion, as well as the startled cries from the staff and patrons of the supermarket.

"Everyone down!" Skip roared, surprised at how deep and authoritative he sounded. His eyes snapped open even as he started forward.

The two nearest crooks were pawing at their eyes and smacking themselves with their own guns. The third would-be-robber was staring at his two partners while the lobster dangled from his nose. "Hey, hey, Morris, look at ‘dat!"

Skip balled his hand into a fist and punched the dark haired Morris's jaw as hard as he could.

"Ow!" Skip exclaimed.

"Ow, Ow, " Morris shouted. His gun waved towards Skip's face.

"Wise guy, huh?"

Skip ducked as the gun roared over his head. The bullet plowed into a stack of canned tomatoes that fell with a crash.

Skip was quite sure he didn't want to get shot. He was not nearly as bullet proof as Direwolf. But he couldn't just let Morris keep firing. Then he spotted the ten-pound bag of potatoes that one of the panicked customers had left on the checkout counter. Skip grabbed the bag.

"This spud's for you!" He shouted, swinging the bag into Morris shoulder.

The crook went down amid a spray of potatoes.

Skip turned, knuckles still smarting from his one punch and saw Devon sitting on the frizzy haired robber holding onto his ears. Lawrence's face was twisted into an expression of pain.

"It seemed like the thing to do," Devon explained.

"Look! The other one is getting away!" One of the supermarket clerks shouting towards the door. Sure enough, the portly, bald crook was running for the exit. He was too far to catch, so Skip grabbed a weapon from his own cart and threw. The paper bag of over ripe bananas flew through the air.

"You missed!" Devon called as the bag hit the floor in the doorway.

"No I didn't!"

The fleeing felon ran into the scattered yellow fruit and promptly slipped. He hit the floor, stood up, tried to run and fell again. This continued for several more iterations while Skip collected the fallen revolver and closed on Carl, who ended up on his shoulder, spinning in place.

"Now, you put your hands up!" Skip insisted. "Looks like we got them all!"

Devon nodded. "Felt good. But why do I want to whistle the Three Blind Mice song?"

Skip shrugged, feeling elated at what they had done, Then, he realized that everyone in the Supermarket was clapping and cheering for them. That felt even better.

Jason made it home shortly before eleven, his cloths spattered with rock flour mud from the petrology lab.

"Hi guys," he said walking into the kitchen and heading for the fridge. Devon and Skip were at the table. "Hope you guys had a good evening. I cut rocks to well past my heart's content. Anything interesting happen?"

Skip looked at Devon with a smile.

"You want to tell him?" he whispered.

"Tell me what?" Jason said, turning back to them. "I can hear you plain as day. By the way, when you were at the SuperKing, did you happen to pick up any bananans?"

With that, Devon and Skip dissolved into laughter.

To be continued...